Visible Lip Liner – Make it go Away!

pamelaandersonbaywatchYes, it’s back. How do I know that it’s really back and not some Alzheimeresque glitch in the brains of oldsters like myself who were around for this travesty the first time?

 Because the women currently wearing it were clanking alphabet blocks together in kindergarten in the mid-1990’s, which means they’ve never seen it except in pictures, and are reincarnating it for a reason – presumably because they think it looks good. (They are wrong).

 I’m not talking about normal nude-colored lip liner which you can’t see (if it’s done properly), I’m talking about dark brown pencil overdrawn with a pale centre. Back in the day Naomi Campbell, Pamela Anderson and Vanessa Paradis all went there, and it is still quite the staple lip look for the Playboy crowd. Presumably the idea is that overdrawing your mouth in chocolate crayon makes your lips look bigger, and hopefully, (perhaps for the sight impaired?) more Bardot-like. That was the 90’s theory anyway.  But no guy in the world is going to fall for the fiction that your lips are three times their actual size due to the fact that they are etched in with sludge brown.

 The first sighting was about two weeks ago on a 15 year old on a bus who had the aforementioned lip look that I thought I would never see again – and damn didn’t it take me back! To a time when CJ Parker was queen of the beach on Baywatch, Vanilla Ice was considered to be a sex symbol and Heather Locklear was out-bitching all the inhabitants of Melrose Place.

 I’m deeply ashamed to say that I not only participated in this trend for a while, I actively embraced it. Behold a fair skinned, blue-eyed blonde who used a PURPLE BROWN Maybelline eyeliner to out line my whole mouth, then filled in with MAC Faux, a Pepto Bismol pinky grey.  How ghetto is that?? Perhaps it’s for makeup sins like these that I became a makeup artist? If so I’m going to be doing penance for a looong time. Luckily there are no photos still in existence of this look which can only be described as One Hot Mess.

 Even though, clearly, I have a pretty good idea of how to recreate this look at home, I’m not giving you any hints on how to rock this particular trend – if you’re into it you can channel your inner Baywatch Bunny and sort it out yourself.

 The scariest thing of all is it’s going from the street to high fashion since major makeup artist Peter Phillips used a hardcore visible chocolate lip liner on Lara Stone in this month’s W. This means, like a tsunami, you can run but you can’t hide. It’s coming to get you. Be very afraid!


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